The inspiration for the following post comes from two places. First being that my neighbours are having sex on their bathroom counter again (the blinds are open and I am convinced they do this for my benefit since my office looks into their “Playroom”) and the other inspiration comes from the fact that I was offered to participate in a threesome this past week.
Basically a girl who I haven’t talked to in years and years and years contacted me through Facebook to say Hi and to confess that there was regret that we never did the ‘ole “half half whole” and that if I wanted to I could now……and if need be I could bring my wife. I am not sure if the invitation was genuine since apparently offering insincere threesome invitations are all the rage with the kids these days!
All this threesome talk got me thinking about just how many times I have actually been offered sexual encounters by ladies that were not my wife. Now I don’t consider myself to be a very good looking guy so I am just as, if not more surprised at some of my offers then anyone.
I am going to fill you in on the details of the two most interesting stories but I will fess up that since I never acted on these offers, the stories are kinda anti climactic.
Two years ago in Long Beach California I was exhibiting at WWLA (a comic book convention) and in the course of selling and signing my comic books I met and started chatting with this super cool girl (I know this is sad but I never got her name). Like I said, she was super cool. She loved comics….and more importantly, MY COMICS!. She was cute (not a bathing suit model, but then again either am I) We were chatting and we liked the same books, movies, music etc etc etc. Things were too perfect…..so much so that I even suspected that this was a practical joke and this girl was possibly a prostitute and we sent by friends as a source for amusement.
Long story short we kept chatting and she asked me to join her for dinner and made it so clear that even someone as thick as me understood that there would be “desert” (yes I know that sounds creepy). I was still undecided if I could even go to dinner. I dug this girl and as horrible as this sounds I was in a town I had never been and would’ve loved the company for dinner. Well as we kept talking we figured out that we knew some people in common and after digging a little deeper I discovered that she was distantly related to my wife. Needless to say this killed the mood and I never saw my little geek princess again.
Told you these stories are anti-climactic……well at least this one involves nudity.
Same city, same convention only a year later……I am minding my own business taking a little “ME” time in the hotel’s roof top Hot Tub. I am all alone just kinda hangin’ out when a pretty hot girls asked if she could join and preceded to hop in. We got to chatting and she told me she was an actresses. I later checked and she had starred in a couple “B” movies but most were not listed on IMBD.com……I checked!
The girl was loaded………as in drunk and not money (the money part I have no idea but it was a fancy hotel) . After chatting for a half an hour or so (this is very late BTW. I had already had dinner and a business meeting before the tub party) I could see that this girl was ready to fall asleep any moment. Before she did she removed her top (unsolicited but maybe she was a mind reader?) and preceded to (while still topless) crash out. She fell asleep in the tub and I had no idea what to do………….so I did what I think every person in my place should and could do.
I carried her out if the water and placed her on a lounge chair….covered her up (after taking one last look ) went up to my room……got dressed…..went to the front desk and told them that there was a drunk, topless girl sleeping in the pool area.
……again another girl I never saw again.
None of these stories are new to my wife as she has heard them all…….isn’t proud of them but she knows the endings are always the same.
Hope you liked my little antics and come back tomorrow as I will have a new post full of quick hits for you guys (and gals) to enjoy!